I’m writing this post the night before, arguably, the most important exam of my life.
Over dramatic? No, not considering if I do (really) poorly, I will be kicked out of UBC, $3000 poorer and forced to take a year off before I can go through the entire application process again.
And yet, here I sit, blogging on my bed. I’m not frantically cramming quotes into my brain or attempting to memorize each and every time Mr. Darcy looks at Elizabeth. In fact, I have done absolutely no studying today and completed a grand total of fifteen minutes yesterday. And why is that?
Because I’m confident.
I’m not just being lazy – I have spent the last 2 weeks absolutely pouring over Pride & Prejudice and Death of A Salesman. I analyzed and re-analyzed themes, studied characters to their core and found new insights to apply to different themes. I actually went through old diploma exam themes from 1988-2010 and thought of essay topics for every. single. one. Thats forty-six different theme statements, folks. I can twist P&P pretty much any direction I want, if necessary. Worst comes to worst, I fall back on Death of A Salesman, which I can say a lot about.
I feel like we are subconsciously told by our world to doubt ourselves. Someone else is studying until midnight, so you should too. That girl over there runs 6x per week in order to run a certain time, but you only run 5x per week to go faster – should you run 6x anyway?
NO! Confidence is not something that magically appears when things are all well and good. If it did, the whole world would be strutting their stuff and it wouldn’t be an issue. To me, confidence is a decision. You can make the choice to trust yourself, trust the work that you put in and have faith in yourself.
Or, you can worry yourself into a corner and cry.
I’ve definitely picked the second option more times than I can count. Remember me in January? I was convinced I was going to get 12% on chemistry and I ended up getting 92%. When it comes to school, friends, and even running I have literally worried so much that I felt nauseous. And it’s so pointless! Worrying gets us NOWHERE. Hard work + confidence = success. Always. It may take
one a million tries but it will in the end.
So what I am saying is this: If it is the night before your first marathon and you are convinced you are going to hit the wall at 5, 10, or 20 miles, believe in yourself. Trust the training but more importantly your own strength to do whatever you set your mind to. It’s the night before the MCAT/board exam? You just spend who knows how many hours in class/studying problems that half the people you know couldn’t even dream of solving. You have got this. Or honestly, if you just doubt your ability to make it through the day (goodness knows I’ve been there) think about all the things you have overcome in the past, and your ability to keep putting one foot in front of the other.
Guys, WE’VE GOT THIS! Catch you on the other side!